PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize