He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
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