All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize