i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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