No, you can still breathe under the balls.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
