She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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