Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
