Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
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