Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize