It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Randomize
