We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize
