I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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