Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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