I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
Love having children with random chicks
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
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Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
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Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(