...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I have fence marks all over my body
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize