i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize