Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
North Korea, Best Korea!
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Enjoy the penises
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize