You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
