woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
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I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
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Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
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