Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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