happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Randomize
