Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
