Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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