where am i from again
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
