Whats the glycemic index on semen?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Randomize
