party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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