Pappa wants mamma naked
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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