Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
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