So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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