"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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