Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize