you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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