My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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