**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
wow bdsm is so cute
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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