It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
