nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
