He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
