You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize
