Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
