just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
