Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right? http://tfl.nu/zs4y
  Replies (39) Good night (2983) Bad night (723) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child." http://tfl.nu/sqg2
  Replies (18) Good night (5443) Bad night (2564) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game. http://tfl.nu/rksq
  Replies (8) Good night (3395) Bad night (995)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog. http://tfl.nu/8mg1
  Replies (18) Good night (10023) Bad night (1653) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore... http://tfl.nu/z5qk
  Replies (11) Good night (3496) Bad night (695) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening. http://tfl.nu/ib1o
  Replies (10) Good night (2992) Bad night (1572) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well. http://tfl.nu/nn8d
  Replies (12) Good night (2964) Bad night (811) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it. http://tfl.nu/gp6s
  Replies (7) Good night (2982) Bad night (922) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman. http://tfl.nu/78fa
  Replies (2) Good night (1049) Bad night (1940) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood. http://tfl.nu/yy48
  Replies (4) Good night (533) Bad night (1492) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice http://tfl.nu/nj79
  Replies (5) Good night (1356) Bad night (609) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie. http://tfl.nu/eccp
  Replies (4) Good night (2084) Bad night (486) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Peanut butter balls.

  (1-206): View more from Washington

  IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): Peanut butter balls. (1-206): IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD http://tfl.nu/s2fd
  Replies (10) Good night (554) Bad night (869) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (712): Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking. http://tfl.nu/ew1c
  Replies (5) Good night (1223) Bad night (444) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us. http://tfl.nu/sjtk
  Replies (1) Good night (316) Bad night (183)

Randomize