Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Randomize
