Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
