Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.

Fav 7 991 3005
share tweet
(832): View more from Houston, Texas

moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone

Fav 14 3605 1721
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(865): View more from Tennessee

You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.

Fav 15 5916 808
share tweet
(941): View more from Florida

so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.

Fav 41 1123 10618
share tweet
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
Read it at the TFLN blog
(915): View more from Texas

I told you I was good to drive

(1-915): View more from Texas

dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate

Fav 54 74807 2939
share tweet
(203): View more from Connecticut

What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?

Fav 57 4428 2009
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(214): View more from Texas

So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.

Fav 9 1206 2472
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(269): View more from Michigan

You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors

Fav 3 745 996
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(306): View more from Saskatchewan

How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?

Fav 3 478 334
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT