one might say we're banned from that church
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
