That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
