And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
