i always forget guys have bellybuttons
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
