You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
