Rock
Scissors
Fuck
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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